Saturday 19 September 2015

A Portrait of A different person - By Ebrahim Saadawi

Tonight we speak of someone else, it doesn't matter who he is, the only thing that matters is that inside each one of us, some of his traits live, and understanding the inner mind of people, is the key to becoming a better person, helping us avoid thier disadvantages and learn from their advantages.



My analysis of the person under question is a reslult of severly long, accurate, and technical psychological assesment of human behaviour and is not just observing someone's life, not an opinion, but pure scientific facts that exist within each one of us. You will find that you share some of his traits and that you don't share others, no matter which one it is, as in the end nothing is more important than understanding human behaviour to help us deal with others, accordingly...


Personality Traits:

-Occasional avoidance of normal social activities involving interaction with others, such as school or work, due to having a great sense of comfort in isolation and great discomfort in groups/around others. He's shy yet hides his shyness with false friendliness.


-Has a personal safe zone, most likely lives alone, and believes nobody under any circumstances enter that zone, which hurts others who don't understand his behaviour towards his home/house/room, showing as a sign of unfriendliness and alienation, when it's not.


 -Mis-trust - most likely due to past experience of putting incorrect trust in others (which destroys him as he always believed in his ability to accurately judge others, but this experience/s prove he's not), leading to cold behaviour in relationships and complete distance from romantic intimacy with anybody...


 -A Negative Perfectionist. Having unrealisticly highly perfect standards to meet before starting activities, due to strong fear & un-healthy hypersensitivy of failure (High experience prior to starting work, high acceptance before starting a conversation\relationship with another)


-Abnormal affection and love for being approved/admired by others, nothing makes him happy as much as honest true compliments of others, which is the key to earning his acceptance


-Inconsistent involvement with peers/friends, being close at periods and far at other periods without giving cause, as he feels his personal life is completely his own and does not trust or feel comfortable bringing anyone into it, Leading to being seen as un-interested & unfriendly to them (rightfully so), eventually leading to isolation except for a very small or un-existent number of peers/friends who understand and tolerate his behaviour and respect his private nature. They hardly realize that he truly cares for them more than anything they could ever imagine, still to this day praying to some, each single day, that they'd find happiness and comfort in their lives, yet he's just unable/unwilling to express it through


-Parentification: Reversed role of a child with the role of a parent, most likely due to loss of a parent/s and subsequent taking of their place/role in a family, giving him/her a negatively much older mind-age than his biological one, leading to strong development of parental qualities (care, over-protection, advice-giving) and strong under-development of childhood qualities (depenence on others, playing, enjoying small daily activities)

-Under fear towards a loved one, he always thinks of the worst-case-scenarios and suffers from anxiety disorders until it's over, where he immediately returns to his normal functioning state


 -Extremely over-protective towards loved ones (only towards first-class family relatives = siblings & parents, only), most evident in experiencing severe anxiety, nosebleeding, accelerated heart rate, loss of concentration, in any small situation where one of them might remotely be in any sort of danger, sometimes leading them to feel being strangled/controlled (rightfully) and sometimes leading them to feel loved/important (also true) depending on the personality of the person


-Strong absence of normal crying reflex, except for only one ocassion during an entire lifetime, even as a newborn baby, and even when traumatic experiences occur, despite the intense feel of strong pain and saddness, only displaying a cold, non-reacting face, leading others to (rightfully and normally) falsely believe the person has a lack feelings and emotions.


 -Constant and extreme unhealthy escapisim from reality by day-dreaming, reading, watching or creating an alternative comfortable world where everything works perfectly, sometimes showing in the form of abnormal un-interepted interest/involvement in a specific study area for years and years, up to 12-14 hours a day, again as a form of escapisim from reality.


-Strong susceptibility to medication/drug abuse, most commonly anti-depressants and opiates, as another alternative form of escapsim from reality and strong unparalleled comfort of being there, therefore giving high risk of involvement in substance addiction unless strong control is applied from within himself or from loved ones


 -Displaying behaviour giving an appearance to others as being extremely intelligent, smart, strong, resulting in others constantly seeking advice and friendship, even when his apparent qualities might not be strictly true, due to strong negative capability of deception and lying to others when desired,


-Passive-aggressive behaviour, where he belittles and criticizes others achievements, see them as being marginal and unworthy, yet in a friendly passive manner and tone.


-Extreme sense of false great self-image (appearance) and great self-worth (mind) and superiority to society, and feel of being under-appreciated, due to being raised being told that each day, resulting in display of arrogant behaviour that others mostly despise. But this behaviour is not related to narcassitic behaviour as it doesn't involve the key abusive nature towards others which defines narcissim,


-Lack of desire to involve oneself in conflicts/fights with others, displaying avoidance to those who insult them, giving an external cold appearance of not caring and of peaceful nature, which is false as internally they do feel the desire for revenge and the pain of being insulted, but just believe the involvement in fights/arguments are unworthy of time and more destructive that supressing pain/desire of revenge.


-Extreme, unexplained lack of performing personal small pleasures enjoyed by others, such as music, films, going out, singing, cloth, gadgets, love, religious rituals, food, etc


 -Extreme intentional avoidance of hearing/following tragic news that are outside his first-degree relatives area, leading to complete shut-off of media, politics and news, most likely due to the excessive emotional impact they have on him,


 -Lack of spirituality, any sort of believe in illogical, unscientific spiritual beliefs and stories, resulting in cold sarcastic behaviour towards them, even though he believes they are helpful to the human mind he just doesn't believe in them, again avoiding discussion/argument/fighting over it, giving a strong sense of mind-isolation from society when he/she lives in a highly religious community, which is the single most affecting element to his isolated personality and depression, and the most significant part of life he went through for years and years,


 -He feels significantly more comfort in speaking to a piece of paper than to someone else, as he feels he's the one that understands him,


-He avoides the idea participating in any new adventure experiences, and feeling of great sense of comfort in following repeatable scheduled routine.


 -Extreme unquestionable obedience of laws and terms, never approaching any type of rebelious behaviour towards authority, as they feel laws are the building brick of any successful society, he/she is the definition of being by-the-book and following procedure, good citizens.


 -Unhealthy wide, zoomed-out perception/view of the world as being small in the universe vastness, being extremely unimportant, extremely marginal, therefore having an even stronger view of unimportance and tiny size of anything/anyone that occurs on the globe, due to the extremely tiny size of the globe and the the extreme tiny size of one compared to the unimaginable number of people who existed and vanished throughout history leading to under-evaluation of personal success.


-Complete loss of ability to feel either extreme happiness nor extreme saddness, under any confitions. Most likely due to a previous past loss of an extremely happy experience and a loss of an extremely sad experience. He believes it's sad and unhealthy, but he also sees it's gives him a great sense of stability and ability to handle crisis without breaking.


-Extremely strong internal - not external - hold to values, love, friendship, principles, devotion, truthfulness, kindness, freedom, patriotism, being a ''good'' human being to others, having a nice tongue,

-Extreme sense of organization and and achievement when he desires so, he has an obsessive sense of structure believing that everything should be planned, broken down into small pieces and organized accurately prior to performing any actions,


-He believes that anyone who ever intentionally hurt a person, himself or others, either physically or emotionally, is an abnormal individual.


-Has an extremely clear long-term dream, but not a short-term one,

-He has dream of becoming a father to someone, one of the very few things he knows he will be perfect at doing,

-He has a dream of having one devoted partner he can be alone with, rather than being alone by himself, to get the feeling he/she's not missing anything outside the box they're together in, as he always has a problem of feeling the constant missing of things in the outer world.

-He has a dream of having a partner to complete his missing piece, to show his partner an endless dedication to make her happy in every single way available to mankind, including doing things that conflict with his own comfort, in exchange for unlimited trust and honesty,

 -He/she simply has no hate, no despise, to absolutely anyone in life, he doesn't forgive, simply because he already forgives everyone at the moment, no matter what he/she did, significant or insignificant. When he's asked to think of someone he dislikes, his answer is ''I can't think of any''.


 -He/she believes that financial success, fame, respect of others, will certainly at one point happen to him/her, having no doubt of what he will accomplish, believes that no one else is even remotely close to what he is capable of whenever he desires,

-He has a strong sense of grandeur and superiority, especially when it's asserted by others in words and behaviour, which something that he truly likes.


 -The highest dream he can think of, is having for everyone he ever knew, he knows, and will ever know, anyone he cared about, has absolute no hate towards himself no matter how small, no matter how tiny, and that he ends his journey in life knowing that fact, but, he understands that people are different and that this is one dream he will never fullfil,


 His name is, a different person

Living where nobody speaks the language he speaks,

Making isolation and pretending of being one of them, the only way to coup, and finish his journey as peacefully and happily as possible.

Monday 5 August 2013

انا البلطجى... وافتخر!



  • كلمة اصبحنا معتادين على سماعها . بلطجية مثل كلمات اخرى كمأجورين ومندسين وطرف ثالث وفلول الخ الخ. لكن يعنينى هنا الصفة الاولى المسماه بالبلطجة. والتى يحصل صاحبها على لقب بلطجى وحينها يصبح حلال الدم ومستباح العرض والمال وربما ايضا يصبح كافر خارج من الملة. الكل يتبرأ منك عزيزى البلطجى. لاتتعجب لانى اناديك بعزيزى . ولا تنبهر اذا ما ناديتك با اخى وحبيبى. فهى الحقيقة . هى الحقيقة التى وجدتها عندما قمت بالتفتيش فى اعماق قلبى وذهنى وعقلى. اخى البلطجى . اخى فى الانسانية الذى لولا الحظ والظروف وامور من اتفه التفاهات, كان من الممكن ان تتبدل مواقعنا فا اكون انا البلطجى المجرم رب السوابق وانت الطبيب اللطيف الطيب ابن الناس. لست افضل منك لا انا ولا غيرى ولا حتى من يجلس فى قصر الاتحادية الذى الى جانب تجاهله التام لك .هو لا يهتم ولا يستطيع ان يتفهم انك انسان لك حقوق ولك حرمة ولك كل ماله حتى لو كنت من يسموه بالبلطجى.
    سامحنى اخى العزيز. او بصراحة ارى انه من المبالغة ان اطلب منك العفو, فأنا لو كنت قد ذقت ما اذاقك الزمان اياه لما سامحتك ولا كنت سأسامح احد ولكنت قد اعلنت الحرب على هذا المجتمع الشرير الانانى. وكنت ان استطعت ووجدت المقدرة سأصر اليوم على ان اكون بلطجى واستمتع وانا اعبر عن غضبى بما تسمونه بلطجه.
    ماذا تريدون من طفل لم يحصل حنان واحتواء وحماية أب وام واسرة واخوة وبيت واصدقاء . ماذا نتوقع منه وقد جاء الى الحياة وجد نفسه لايحظى با اى شىء ولم يحصل على اى حد ادنى من اى شىء
    انسان تقهره الحياه, وبعدما تركنا الحياة تقهرك واخذنا نعيش سنة وراء سنة وجيل وراء جيل, وكنا ان اردنا ان نشعر انفسنا باننا انسان واننا رحماء واننا ذوى دين نرمى لك بالفتات. ونقدمه لك وكأنه منحة او صدقة رغم انه حق اصيل لك يا اخى العزيز. نعم حق تفرضه أشياء كثيرة ولن اتطرق للفلسفات الدينية والغيبية فحتى اكثر الفلسفات المادية والانسانية البحتة تقر هذا الحق
  • انا البلطجى نعم القى بالحجارة على المبنى الذى يمثل المدينة. ويجلس فيه صانعوا القرار الذين تم وضعهم هنا لكى يمنحونى اى شىء من حقوقى فانتطرت ولما طلبت, بل مجرد تساءلت, وجدتهم اساسا لم يضعونى فى الحسبان ووجدت انهم منشغلين بامور اخرى تماما ووجدت نفسى بالنسبة لهم البلطجى المجرم الذى يجب ان نرسل له العساكر فيقبضوا عليه ويلقوا به فى اقرب سجن ولو مات يكون قد اراح وارتاح . وجدتهم لايبالون. ولايعرفون اساسا من انا ولماذا انا هنا .

  • لم احصل على اى حق من حقوقى منذ خرجت من رحم امى التى هى اصلا لم تحصل على شىء... وربما تكون حزينة وهى تلدنى خائفة على مستقبلى تتساءل ياترى الى اين ستأخذك الحياة . نعم ربما يكون هذا لسان حالها فى الوقت الذى من الطبيعى ان يكون هذا يوم كيوم العرس او الزفاف الكل حولك يحتفى بك ويبارك لك. لم احصل على حنان ام او اب . لكننى اثق ان هذا ليس ذنب ابى وامى لانهما ايضا كانت لهم تفاصيل وظروف ربما اكثر سوء . لانهم اساسا لم يجربوا او يذوقوا الحنان والحب والاحتواء لهذا فهم لايعرفوه فكيف اتوقع ان يقدموه لى! لم احصل على اى تقدير من المجتمع المحيط. اقصى شىء احصل علية هو نظرات العطف, وهذا ان كان من ينظر صاحب نفس رقيقة وانما فى الطبيعى لا ارى الا نظرات التعالى والغرور والاحتقار . يتعامل معى من حصلوا على القاب من عينة "باشا وبيك" على اننى فى درجة اسفل منهم فى سلم الكائنات الحية .
    كيف تريدنى ان اطرق عليك بابك يامن يجلس فى مبنى المحافظة ؟ لماذا اراك غاضب ومتعجب ؟ اياك واياكم ان تنكروا على استخدامى للحجارة وكرات اللهب والعنف..... والبلطجة . انتم من صنعتم منى بامتياز افضل نموذج ليكون عليه البلطجى . واى شخص فيكم انتم وابناؤكم وعشائركم لو كان مكانى لكان من الممكن ان يكون كائن ابشع واكثر بلطجة واجرام بكثير.

  • لاتلمنى ان كنت اليوم او غدا او بالامس قد قررت الصراخ معترضا بوسائلى الخاصة كما تعترض انت بوسائلك الخاصة . اذهب للجحيم. نعم انا بلطجى وافتخر . انا الثورة يامن تظن الثورة اغنية او رقصة او قصة او كلمتين فى برنامج. وانا احق الناس بالثورة . وانا الذى اعرف بالظبط ما الذى يصنع الثورة اما انتم مهما حاولتم ومهما درستم وبحثتم لن تعرفوا وسيظل ظهورنا لكم المفاجىء بالبلطجة المعتادة التى تصمونا بها سيظل ظهورا مفاجىء ومحير وغير مفهوم وستظلوا مترددين تحاولون فهم متى واين بالتحديد وكيف ولماذا. نحن الحقيقة ونحن التجسيد الواقعى والحقيقى للمعاناه الانسانية فى اصعب صورها. انا البلطجى... ولا اشعر بالعار... وسأظل البلطجى حتى ارى عدالة اجتماعية حقيقية تضمن لى ابسط حقوقى كمواطن...

Wednesday 19 June 2013

المرأة والرجل فى امثلة للإسلام المتطرف, وجهة نظر...

سأل رجل غربى احد الشيوخ المسلمون فقال له: لماذا تصونون نسائكم بهذا الشكل ولا تريهم لاحد غيركم؟      
تبسم الشيخ واخذ جوهرة ثمينة وقال، ان كانت تلك الجوهرة لك, فهل ستضعها فى الطريق ليراها ويلتقطها الجميع, ام ستضعها فى خزانة وتحافظ عليها؟    


فرد الغربى قائلا: بالطبع سأضعها فى الخزانة

فقال الشيخ: هكذا نعامل نسائنا, كالجواهر الثمينة-    

فبكى الرجل الغربى ودخل فى الاسلام-   







هذه احدى القصص الشهيرة من العديد من القصص التى تحمل نفس المعنى الى يرددها العديد من المسلمون المتشددون فى جميع انحاء الوطن العربى وفى منطقة الخليج العربى خاصة.
هل تحمل القصة عبرة او معنى صحيح؟ نعم, فالشىء الثمين يجب ان نحافظ علية.
 هل نستطيع تطبيق تلك العبرة على النساء؟ بالطبع لا,
 وسأوضح وجهة نظرى فى سطور قليلة لتجنب الملل والاسترسال فى الحديث.


الغائب عن الشيخ الحكيم فى ذلك المثال السخيف هو أمر هام لا يمكن تجاهله, على الأقل بالنسبة لى ولأى انسان متحضر ويؤمن بالمساواة والحرية والتدين المعتدل, وهو ان المرأة ليست جماد كالجوهرة, او قطعة الحلوى كما يقال فى امثلة اخرى, بل فهى انسان كامل كالشيخ تماما ولة احتياجات ومشاعر واحاسيس التى من الواضح لا يدركها شيخنا الحكيم. 
فعندما تلقى بالجوهرة الثمينة فى الخزانة فانها لا تشعر بالوحدة الشديدة لعدم وجودك معها فى الخزانة للحديث معها, بينما انت فى الخارج تمارس حياتك الاجتماعية بشكل كامل ولا تتذكرها.
 
وعندما تلقى بالجوهرة الثمينة فى الخزانة فانها لا تشعر بالخوف الشديد من الظلام القاتم

وعندما تلقى الجوهرة الثمينة فى الخزانة  فانها لا تشعر بالاحساس الشديد فى ضياع حقوقها الانسانية والجسدية والنفسية مقارنة بك.



اسف ايها الشيخ الحكيم, لكنك لا تسطيع معاملة المرأة كقطعة حجارة ملك لك, تخرجها من الخزانة لتستمتع بها وقت مايحلو لك, وتضعها فى الخزانة وقت ما تمل منها.
المرأة انسان كامل مثلك تماما, ولها الحق فى ممارسة حياتها الاجتماعية والطبيعية خارج "الخزانة" التى تريدها فيها بحجة المحافظة عليها.
انت كنت تقدر قيمة المرأة وتعتبرها ثمينة حقا, فاحرص كل الحرص على ان تجعلها سعيدة, والا تشعر بالوحدة والخوف طالما انت على وجة الارض, والا تشعر بانها اقل منك فى اى مجال او شىء وحتى لو كانت تمتلك دورا مختلفا عنك.
وحافظ على تلك الجوهرة باخذها معك الى العالم الخارجى لتراه ويراها الناس, وحرصك على تتلقى تعليمها وثقافتها الكاملة وتشعر بوجودها الكامل, واحرص ايضا فى نفس الوقت على الا يفكر فى الاقتراب منها او لمسها للحظة واحدة اى شخص ايا كان.
هكذا تصون المرأة وتعتبرها كبشر مثلك له كامل الحقوق والواجبات

أتسائل ماذا سيكون شعور الشيخ ان قالت له امرأته ساضعك فى خزانة طوال حياتك ولا ترى احد ولا يراك احد ولا تتحدث مع احد ابدا, هل سيشعر بانة ثمين وغال؟
همممممم

لا اعتقد ذلك :)